Global citizens may grow up fluent in three languages, yet unsure where they belong. True stability comes not from schools or passports, but from trusted adults who anchor a child wherever life takes them.

Parents often tell us they want to raise “global citizens”. It sounds admirable, even inevitable for families with multiple homes and international lives. And yes, it gives children extraordinary advantages, with a rare exposure to new places, experiences, cultures, and languages.

But we want to share the other side. We’ve sat with young people who tick every box on paper – fluent in three languages, educated at the best schools, well-travelled – and yet they can’t answer the simple question, “Where do you belong?”

The unseen challenges of privilege

The struggles of wealthy children rarely get airtime. It is easy to miss the pressures that come with privilege. They are often invisible because the outcomes still look exemplary: top grades, multiple languages, enviable CVs. The struggles may not fit the stereotypes, but they are real:

• Performance pressure: Children in high-achieving, well-resourced environments show elevated risks of anxiety, depression and substance misuse compared with norms. This is not conjecture, it is documented across multiple cohorts of “high-achieving schools”.[1]
• Trust and authenticity: Many young people tell us they struggle to know who likes them for them, and who likes access to their life. It sounds like a small thing but it affects friendships, relationships, and later, hiring and leadership.
• Parental absence, even when love is unquestioned: Global work creates time-zone gaps and irregular contact. Cross-national research links various forms of family separation to differences in academic performance and wellbeing.[2]
• Identity fog: Third Culture Kids often report rootlessness and restlessness, sometimes difficulty answering the simple “Where are you from?” The literature is clear that identity and belonging can be complicated by frequent moves across cultures.[3][4]

These children can end up adrift. Without cultural anchors, or the continuity most of their peers take for granted, they feel they belong everywhere and nowhere at once.

Does boarding school provide stability?

For many internationally mobile families, boarding school looks like the answer. Parents often think, “one school, steady routines, long-lasting friendships”.

Sometimes, it is. For example, an Australian study debunked historical negativity surrounding boarding and urges people to focus on individual students’ differences and prior achievement when evaluating the boarding experience.[5]

However, a happy Hogwarts boarding school experience is not the case for all children. While some certainly thrive, others do not. For those whose parents are based overseas, boarding can amplify distance, and many carry lasting feelings of separation.

UK studies and clinical literature suggest a meaningful subgroup of current and former boarders experience elevated psychological distress, particularly around anxiety, attachment and trauma symptoms.[5] Joy Schaverien’s work, which coined “boarding school syndrome”[6], has brought overdue attention to this, though not all clinicians agree on scope or mechanism.

In our experience, it depends entirely on how well the emotional bridge is built between school and home. Stability has to mean people, not just buildings.

We had one student who was bright, charming, but unsettled. He was sent to a top UK boarding school while his parents lived permanently abroad. Each holiday was spent in a different house in a different country. The school gave him structure, but not roots. His family pulled him out of the school and we recruited a full-time private tutor who travelled with the family. That tutor became the one thread of continuity, reminding him that while places changed, people who cared about him did not.

What a private tutor can offer instead of boarding

This is where a professional tutor makes a huge difference. Not just in academics – though the benefits of one-to-one teaching are well documented, with a 2020 study finding an average effect size of 0.37 standard deviations, enough to lift a child from the middle of the class to well above average compared to peers.[7] But just as importantly, in continuity and stability. A tutor who travels with the family becomes the anchoring adult who remembers the child’s history, who maintains rituals and traditions, who steadies them when schools, homes and even countries change.

A full-time tutor sees the child in full: not just their exam results, but their ambitions, quirks, and anxieties. They are their advocate, mentor and sounding board rolled into one.

A skilled private tutor also helps children develop portable anchors for identity: small rituals such as a shared reading hour, Friday suppers, or reflective journalling. These travel with the child and prevent the drift into rootlessness. They symbolise home, wherever the family happens to be.

Perhaps most importantly, a tutor provides the guardrails for pressure. Children growing up in affluent, high-achieving contexts are two to three times more likely than average to suffer anxiety, depression or substance abuse.[9] A professional tutor models healthy boundaries around sleep, study, technology and social media, and offers a vocabulary for stress that most schools, boarding or otherwise, simply cannot.

In a life of privilege, that kind of constancy is rare and invaluable.

Finding the balance

We don’t think global citizenship is the enemy, but rootlessness and disconnection are very real concerns. The goal is balance: rich cultural exposure alongside a sense of belonging (you can read more about this in our previous article).

That might mean a family home that acts as a true base, careful boarding decisions, or hiring a full-time private tutor who can provide relational stability. The greatest privilege is knowing you always have somewhere and someone to come home to, wherever you are in the world.

References:

[1] Luthar, S.S., Kumar, N.L. (2018). Youth in High-Achieving Schools: Challenges to Mental Health and Directions for Evidence-Based Interventions. Handbook of School-Based Mental Health Promotion. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-89842-1_23

[2] Liu, R., Hannum, E. (2023). Parental absence and student academic performance in cross-national perspective: Heterogeneous forms of family separation and the buffering possibilities of grandparents. International Journal of Educational Development, 102898. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ijedudev.2023.102898.

[3] Fanøe, E.S., Marsico, G. (2018). Identity and Belonging in Third Culture Kids: Alterity and Values in Focus. In: Branco, A., Lopes-de-Oliveira, M. (eds) Alterity, Values, and Socialization. Cultural Psychology of Education, vol 6. Springer, Cham. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-70506-4_5

[4] de Waal, M.F., Born, M.Ph. (2021). Where I’m from? Third Culture Kids about their cultural identity shifts and belonging. International Journal of Intercultural Relations. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ijintrel.2021.04.004.

[5] Papworth, B.A. (2014). Attending Boarding School: A Longitudinal Study of Its Role in Students’ Academic and Non-Academic Outcomes. Faculty of Education and Social Work, University of Sydney, Australia.  https://www.boarding.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/02/Attending-Boarding-School-A-longitudinal-study-of-its-role-in-stundents-academic-and-non-academic-outcomes.pdf

[6] Obituary: Joy Schaverien, psychotherapist who identified ‘boarding school syndrome’. The Guardian. 22 May 2025.  https://www.theguardian.com/society/2025/may/22/joy-schaverien-obituary

[7] Nickow, A., Oreopoulos, P., Quan, V. (2020). The impressive effects of tutoring on preK–12 learning: A systematic review and meta-analysis of the experimental evidence. EdWorkingPaper No. 20-267, Annenberg Institute at Brown University.  https://edworkingpapers.com/ai20-267